Healing the Feminine and Masculine wound?

From my friend and teacher Martin Hahn of www.settingheartsfree.com

“In the end we will conserve only what we love; love only what we understand; and understand only what we have been taught.” Baba Dioum

The great chasm between the masculine and feminine heart that has been created over the past 4 decades, and the ensuing suffering because of it, needs to be healed in order for us to once again be in union and create the love and abundance we were meant to have for each other. Are you up for the challenge? Because it’s up to you and me!

Are you ready to inspire those you know into greater ways of being in all aspects of life – in business, family, romance, friends, neighbors? If you are, then read on.

Untangling the mystery of love

What is Love? And who teaches us about what it means to love another?

We generally get our ideas from our parents, other family members, teachers, ministers and society as a whole. We usually enter this arena with much confusion and are left to our own devices to find out the truth about love. Sometimes the hard way.

The suffering currently going on in the world today because of this simple lack of understanding between the heart of a woman and the heart of a man has reached almost catastrophic proportions. Just look at the divorce rates today.

Many of you have come through Predicament sharing your stories about your experience in love and it hurts. The tears are real. It’s time we started to bridge the gap that has been created between the masculine and the feminine in each of us.

Let’s have a closer look.

In the healing of our hearts let’s look at the following 3 components of love:

1) Romantic Infatuation
2) Sexual Polarity
3) Love

Romantic Infatuation – the ‘falling’ in love.

It usually only happens once or twice in your whole lifetime if you’re lucky. It’s the feeling of finding something in another so deeply familiar it’s as if we’ve known them our whole life and you ’ve finally come home to your soul mate. They’re the one.

Have you ever felt something like this in your life? It’s very powerful.

Are you together with your spouse today because of that feeling?

The truth about romantic infatuation is that it is a trick of the Divine. It’s how we’re brought together to resolve our family issues. It creates a strong attraction, which, when it fades (and it will) we’re left to work through our unresolved family dynamics.

In other words, we’re attracted to someone with the reciprocal past issues to our own and that’s why they seem so familiar in the first place. In a sense it is a coming home. The stronger that feeling the more familiar the unresolved issue we are faced with in that relationship. Does that make sense? Would you like to know the root of this?

The Opening!

Imagine a child born very open, relaxed and loving. It’s like a brand new piece of paper, no wrinkles, smooth, clear. As the child begins to grow and live life, it accumulates certain kinks from its experiences. Through not getting enough love, being shut down for who the child is, being told how to behave all the time, what’s acceptable and what isn’t. Some kinks go quite a bit deeper through abusive situations the child may go through whether verbal, physical or sexual. Can you follow this so far?

Many of these impacts are of an energetic nature and leave imprints on that child’s way of thinking that will shape his or her world from a very young age. Going back to the piece of paper we can start to see the wrinkles begin to appear as the world imparts its stresses on it.

The child, a once very open being, ends up a contorted smaller version of the would be radiant self and begins to act in ways it deems acceptable to others versus showing it’s true nature. All this simply based on history and the accumulation of ‘stuff’ from living life.

We put shells around our hearts to protect ourselves from, sometimes real and sometimes perceived, threats for the rest of our lives. By the time some of us hit 30 we look more like a paper ball than the smooth, new sheet of paper we started as.

Do you think all this would affect your openness? Your willingness to be you in all your splendor as you were meant to live? Of course it does.

Then one day someone asks you who you are and in all honestly, you cannot answer.

There was a woman at a meeting I was at who was in tears because she had lived her whole life doing what other people wanted her to do and she could not answer this question. Didn’t know where to even start. She’s in her 50’s now. That’s heart breaking.

www.settingheartsfree.com/opening.html

These shells of contracture must be cracked if you are to get a glimpse of the true self you were born to be. We all have them to some degree and for some of us the desire to want to know our truth becomes extremely important one day. How much do you want to know the truth of you? Are you ready to begin living life the way it was meant for you?

The divine tricks us into coming together so the real work in relationship can begin when the feeling of familiarity begins to fade.

If you ’re conscious, you can work through these things together. If you ’re not, you ’ll spend your time convincing the other that you ’re right and they need to get some counseling. Do you get it?

Sometimes you stay together because of the kids or the fear of being left alone or not having someone. You just tolerate what was meant to be one of the most beautiful unions on this planet.

Some people move on to another relationship just to realize in short order that the issues appear to be the same although the face is slightly different.

My teacher says: “You take yourself with you where ever you go.”

When the relationship changes and the issues are still the same, after 2 or 3 of them you have to realize that the common denominator is “YOU”. That was a tough one to swallow for me.

I’ll address the other two components to this story, in our next email. Take some time this week to look through your past and see how this idea of romantic infatuation has played out in your life. Does it sound familiar? Where have you been holding back? And why?

Do you want to know who you are beyond the shells of contracture around your heart? Come see!

The Opening

Open Heart, No Fear!

Martin Hahn
www.settingheartsfree.com
President and Lead Facilitator

The Secret of Life: Become a Lake

An aging Hindu master grew tired of his apprentice complaining, and so, one morning, sent him for some salt. When the apprentice returned, the master instructed the unhappy young man to put a handful of salt in a glass of water and then to drink it. “How does it taste?” the master asked. “Bitter,” spat the apprentice.

The master then asked the young man to take another handful of salt and put it in the lake nearby. Once the apprentice swirled his handful of salt in the water, the old man said, “Now drink from the lake.” As the water dripped down the young man’s chin, the master asked, “How does it taste?” “Fresh,” remarked the apprentice. “Do you taste the salt?” asked the master. “No,” said the young man.

At this, the master took the young man’s hands, offering, “The pain of life is pure salt; no more, no less. The amount of pain in life remains exactly the same. However, the amount of bitterness we taste depends on the container we put the pain in. So when you are in pain, the only thing you can do is to enlarge your sense of things . . .Stop being a glass. Become a lake.”

~Author unknown

Wake Up

See the Holidays Clearly – Blindfold Yourself!

  Recently I participated in a blindfolded maze. I went  into it with a cocky attitude because I’m so great at sensing energy pathways. I figured I’d get through it in a snap. However using all my mental strategies led me in circles. Muscle testing didn’t work either. I was really frustrated. Then I realized how full of myself I was…how embarrassing! I threw out all my strategies and got really, really quiet in my head and body. I breathed deeply.

Out of that deep quiet openness I was able to clearly sense what direction to take. When I looked at the maze afterwards I saw that I had been only about 1/2 way through before that. After getting quiet it took me only about 5 seconds to complete the maze. I’m thinking now about the season we are in. There’s already so much loud blasting for attention – sale here – better sale here… Whatever way you use to successfully get through the mazes of your own life perhaps connecting into your own quiet openness will help make this holiday season more magical for you.

Road Trip Check-Up

Have you ever taken a road trip? Most of the people I know enjoy taking trips. How about you?

There is a journey coming up that seems to be creating alot of apprehension instead of joy. I just watched a very interesting 2012 related video called The Quickening that is going viral right now (video is below.) It contains some fascinating, encouraging possibilities, totally worth watching. It also brought up some fear for me. Have you noticed that most things surrounding what might occur in 2012 tend to bring up alot of fear for people?

The fear I felt let me know I have more stuff to clear for myself. For instead of staying in the calm present moment, I chose to drive to the Future Peril Possibilities Mindfrick store. (Ha ha.. I began to write pissibilities. As I was changing it to “possibilities” I thought to myself “Fears are not possibilities. They are pissibilities – piss on ‘em!

One of the things I’ve noticed is that if I’m feeling something, there are usually lots of others going through the same or similar thing. It’s one of the gifts I get to have as a healer/teacher. I get to experience a lot of stuff so I can wave my hand and say to you guys “over here, I see something to clean up over here.”

A very interesting thing they talked about in The Quickening video was a specific date in October of THIS YEAR that they thought could be significant in the 2012 unfolding. I had a feeling that date was right around the conclusion of the Jewish High Holidays. (The High Holidays are all about making things right between you and others, you and yourself and you and God.)

I checked the Jewish Calendar and sure enough, I was right. Why am I mentioning this? Because if you have been receiving newsletters from me for some time you have heard me repeatedly say that I have noticed the energy and meaning of specific Jewish holidays seem to be significant for everyone even if you have never noticed it.

So, I was thinking… would you like to know what I was thinking?… I was thinking that going into 2012, or even going into tomorrow, is like going on a road trip. I don’t know what I am going to encounter on the road – detours, unexpected health concerns, beautiful scenery… I do know that being excited about it is how I’d like to feel, not fearful. I also know if I have my mechanic do a trip check-up on my car before I leave I will have more fun and less headaches because my car will be prepared to easily handle the trip. True or true?

It sure seems that now would be a really great time to do a 2012 road trip check-up group healing session, to clear fear and unconscious blocks we have surrounding 2012 stuff AND to do some personal spiritual house cleaning as we go into the High Holiday season. If the video is right, the two are very closely related this year and coming up in just 4+ weeks, so this is a really, really, really good time to clear as much as we can. Every time we do some energy clearing it makes our personal and collective lives smoother.

On September 2th, 2011 I facilitated a 2012 Road Trip Check-up Group Healing Session.  It was a perfect time to do this session as it was a holiday weekend in the US and Canada, one where many people take their last road trip of the summer. If you would like to experience this incredible transformational session simply register for the replay here http://bit.ly/roadtripreplay (available through September 26, 2011 July 17, 2012.) Call in details will be emailed to you directly after you register.

Not quite sure if this is for you? Read comments from people who have already participated in our Road Trip. Click here: http://zemirahealing.com/blog/?p=307

I’m looking forward to taking this road trip into 2012 with you.

Barbara

P.S. Please share this post with everyone you know. The more people on the Road Trip Check-up the clearer we all get and the smoother our journey will be.

Here The Quickening video.

The Quickening from keith wyatt on Vimeo.

It’s Frickin’ Growing Season

It appears that many of us seem to have been thrown out the window from the 7th story of the Comfort Zone building. We’ve landed in a garden and instead of saying “oh what a beautiful place to be, I get to spend time in nature, get my hands dirty, and create something beautiful, delicious and nutritious” we are freaking out – “something’s wrong, something’s not working right, I don’t know how to take care of a garden….”

When something is uncomfortable for me I now say “Oh, it’s growing season.” That reframes the experience so I am better able to go with the flow, stay open to out of the box solutions, and know that everything is alright. …because, It’s Growing Season!

Addendum
My friend Donna says “Shit is the herald of fertilizer. It’s Comin’!”

A Kick in the Pants

We do things from inspiration or desperation. Sometimes we need to be kicked in the pants by desperation in order to take action on our inspiration.

Rock Out Gratitude

A deep shift was reported by one of my clients. She went on to say ” but I’m not feeling….” When you say “I am not feeling,” or “I wish I were feeling…” you are actually slowing down your healing process by negating the fullness of the shift you have made.

Rock Your Brains Out in Gratitude that you notice something has shifted. That opens the way for more to follow.

Constant Joy

~ Have you been feeling enslaved to an emotion or circumstance?

~ Would you like to be set free?

Could Joy be the key?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Joy gives you the power, motivation and confidence to achieve things
that otherwise seem too difficult to attempt. Better than a granola
bar – joy is pure energy.
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Do you remember the thrill of hitting a home run? Getting out on the last day of school? Riding your new bicycle? You jump with joy. Fantastic!

Joy gives you energy and makes you feel great. You can achieve all kinds of things that otherwise may seem too difficult to attempt. With joy, you’re not afraid to talk to the guy sitting next to you on the plane. No problem! You’ve got energy, buoyancy. You’re alive!

Learn to differentiate between real joy, which generates the power to accomplish, and illusory joy, whose burst of energy fades into a let-down. True joy comes from the pleasure of growth and self-actualization – when we conquer a difficult challenge, or experience a moment of clarity. When your team wins the World Series, or when you win the lottery, the joy is a delusion. Why? Because you did not change or grow. Joy is solely the result of your reaction to life, your commitment to turning every moment into a growth experience.

You’re not reaching your potential unless you have joy. So whether you’re studying, touring, working or relaxing, first get into a state of joy. It will give you a big boost of power and confidence.

For more meditations like this one click here for the entire collection of “Counting the Omer” meditations. (Series of days between Passover and Shavuot (Pentacost))

The following video not only wells up Joy in my heart but I think it could very well be what anyone might sing as celebration once they have been freed from bondage. I hope you enjoy it and feel a release from something that has been enslaving you.

What I Did Over Summer Vacation

It’s that time of year. Childrens’ summer vacations and camps have ended. They are back to school writing essays entitled “What I did During Summer Vacation.”

I too went to camp this summer. Enlightened Warrior Training Camp. But, unlike children who look forward to camp I was like Garfield the Cat on the window – arms and legs extended out to block myself from being pushed through the door. I was having a quiet, and sometimes not so quiet tantrum, whining “I don’t want to go!!!!!”

The “I don’t want to go” began nine months ago, when I first signed up to attend Warrior camp. I knew it was going to be in a form that wold take me out of my comfort zone. And, being a person who likes to avoid emotional as well as physical pain the last thing I wanted was to go out of my comfort zone. However, the true part of me knew I HAD to do exactly that. The true part of me thirsted for the transformation. Frikin’ true me! But, man… look below at the things we were going to learn there. How could I not want that?

WHAT I WAS ABOUT TO LEARN
• How to consciously observe yourself so that you respond to circumstances from choice instead of reacting from conditioning and habit.
• How to tap into your intuition and know when it is giving you direction.
• How to move gracefully with the flow of life instead of struggling against it.
• Simple secrets to peace and happiness in everyday life.
• How to create “focus with balance” in your life.
• How to avoid struggle and overwhelm.
• How to expand your ability to concentrate and stay focused.
• How to dance between your body, mind and spirit in everyday life.
• How to quiet your mind and attain inner peace.
• How the “process of manifestation” works from our inner to our outer world.
• That you are greater than you “think” and that you can be and do much more than you ever imagined! You will finally get to meet the “real” you.

As it is with all the Peak Potentials seminars and camps we never know any of the details beforehand. The reason for that is because the camps and seminars are so experiential if we knew in advance what we’d be doing, well, heck, we might chicken out and not go. Like when I was checking out the website of the ranch the camp was at. On one of the website’s pages there was a photo of a log to walk across about 20 feet off the ground. I didn’t know if we were going to have to do that. Part of me said of course we aren’t doing that because there’s a picture of it on the website and because Peaks courses are so hush hush they would not allow that photo to be up there if we were walking the log. The other part of me freaked out that I was going to have to walk the log. I was more scared seeing that log than when I was only imagining what we might be doing.

So, now I’m getting closer and closer to the camp date and I’m getting more and more freaked out. I decided it didn’t matter if we were walking the log or not. I would use that as a symbol of the scary things we would be doing. I began to do energy work on myself to clear my fears and get me to where I saw walking the log as something easy and enjoyable. It took me several weeks to go from freaked out to excited. Thinking about the deepest transformational exercises at the other Peaks seminars I’ve been to that were so multi-dimensional, that helped me get excited. I wondered what kind of unique approaches they would be using at Warrior Camp.

I also remembered how I used to be afraid of spiders until I became a mom and had to defend my children against the evil spider crawling up their bedroom wall. In one instant I went from afraid of spiders to a superhuman spider killer and protector of children. That made me realize I could move from fear to courage in a split second. So, at warrior camp, if there was something fear inducing that I had to do I would simply think of my children being there and I would be the role model, leading the way so they would see how easy it was, that they could do it too.

The day before I left for Warrior camp, when watching some Rob Riggle stand up comedy on TV he said repeatedly “That’s how I roll.” Now, Riggle is a big guy and a former marine. When I see him I see a warrior. He’s been through a warrior camp much more challenging than the one I’m about to go to. When he says “That’s how I roll” you know not to mess with him. He says it with the grounded confidence I want to tap into. He exudes warrior vibe from every cell of his body. Here’s a segment of his routine so you can get an idea of what I’m talking about.

So, to anchor in that I’m a role model AND the confidence of Riggle’s “that’s how I roll” I found a small river rock to keep in my pocket at camp and painted onto that rock “THAT’S HOW I ROLE.” Finally, I was mentally prepared for Warrior camp.

The 5 days were AMAZING! It was challenging physically, mentally,
and emotionally as well as, surprisingly, spiritually expanding.

On the first full day, half way through the main exercise for that day, I had a breakthrough realization that instead of being other centered, and focusing on being a role model for my children, that I am a role model for myself – that’s like the little me being afraid and the big me leading the way “don’t fear little Barbara, big Barbara will demonstrate to you how to get through this confidently.” By shifting my focus from doing the work for others to doing the work for myself I regained energy. I felt fuller and decluttered.

Each of the daily main exercises was challenging in different ways, clearing crap, bringing profound personal realizations and deepening my connections through the support the members of my “tribe” gave to each other. Sometimes I was the one receiving support. Sometimes I was the one giving help and guidance. In one exercise done with a partner my partner and I looked deeply into eachother’s eyes silently speaking “I’m 100% there for you AND I’m 100% connected to you. We were so locked in to each other it felt like we had unlimited ability. After the event was over we said to each other “wow, we were rock stars!”

In another event I stopped short of complete. My mind and spirit were willing but my body was saying “we’ve left the building.” My teammates were cheering me on and  I did not want to disappoint them but I knew I had to stop or I would hurt myself. My body could not do any more. The next day one of my teammates told me how inspiring that was, that I was courageous enough to admit what was true for myself, though it was not what the group wanted for me.

To be on the other side of all the challenges is nothing short of exhilarating. Knowing that I am a frikin’ incredible person who can do way more than I imagined as well as stand up for myself though it’s an unpopular position, is the most deeply empowered I’ve ever felt.

Final evening of camp with Aaron G from my Tribe

As I walked back to my cabin for the last time I was sooo glad the intensity of the 5 days was finally over. I would get on the plane in the morning, catch up on some much needed sleep and relax. I wondered how different my regular life would be when I got home. It turned out I got to find that out sooner than I expected.

When I boarded the airplane to go home I surprisingly discovered my seat was in an exit row. I took a big gulp and said out loud “no, no, no, no, no!” I did not want the responsibility that came along with sitting there. I sat down because I knew before the plane took off the flight attendant would ask me if I was comfortable handling the exit door. I could switch seats then. Then I “woke up” and thought to myself “Sheesh Barbara, you just finished warrior training camp where you became more confident in your leadership skills, and you don’t think you can handle the exit door? Suck it up princess! You’re in this seat because you CAN handle it! You are being given a gift by being in this seat. The universe is telling you that you can handle this and maybe you’re the best prepared person on this plane to handle it.” That made me feel pretty good.

A few minutes later two big guys came up the aisle, stopped at my row and looked at their boarding passes…. turned out I had misread the seat numbers and my seat was really one row forward. The flight attendant came while the men took their rightful seats in the exit row and I moved to mine. He asked them if they were comfortable sitting in the exit row. They said yes and then the flight attendant said “If for some reason you aren’t she’ll (pointing to me) help you.” Knowing that was absolutely true, I laughed, the attendant laughed, and the people in the row behind the exit, who heard me say “no, no, no, no, no!” laughed.

Once in the air I recalled how I had chosen this particular flight so I wouldn’t have to take a tiny 20 seat plane. A few years ago I released my flying fears but flying in a tiny plane was still an issue for me. I wondered if the processes I went through at warrior camp changed that. So I thought about being on the ground in front of a tiny plane with someone standing there inviting me to get in the plane. My immediate thought was “Bring it on!”

The next surprise came during a 2 hour layover before my final flight home. Usually during these layovers I’m bored, tired, and probably having some negative thought about how sucky it is to have a 2 hour layover. I started to go to that place but what immediately came into my head was a firm “What is your objective? – – – To get home.” Suddenly everything else disappeared. I became laser focused on my mission to get home. My energy level increased, I had less muscle stiffness and my attitude was positive. Though I was operating on about 3 hours sleep I stayed alert and focused all the way home and into the evening.

A warrior does everything at 100%. When I got home I followed through on that. This is what I wrote on Facebook the next day: “I am a warrior. A warrior does everything at 100% Today I am sleeping 100%. A-HO!*” And that’s exactly what I did.

=> See Comments, below, for a passionate description written by one of our youngest Warriors after her return from camp.

AN ENLIGHTENED WARRIOR …
… is self-confident, strong, and honorable.
… is in tune with his or her higher self and uses the power of intuition for guidance and direction.
… enjoys inner peace and fulfillment in life; he or she finds joy in simplicity.
… knows his or her purpose; is clear about what they want and where they are going.
… is a master of money, not controlled by it.
… goes with the flow of life instead of fighting against what life is trying to offer.
… accepts him or herself and others for where they currently are on the path of life.
… has learned to be happy whether he or she gets what they want or not .
… is centered and balanced.
… is clear and focused, not confused and scattered.
… lives with ease instead of struggle.
… lives in the present not the past or future.
… does not yearn for approval and recognition from others; approves of them self.
… appreciates and feels part of nature and the spirit in all living things.
… lives with integrity; their word law.
… is fun-loving and free-spirited.
… has the courage to take action in spite of fear, doubt and worry.

If you are interested in attending the Enlightened Warrior Training Camp next summer I support you and cheer you on. If I can do it You can do it! (The age range of those at my camp was 15 – 84!) I also highly recommend you first attend Peak’s three day Millionaire Mind Intensive (MMI) as that will help you clear a number of self sabotaging, fear, pain and sadness, issues. And, at the MMI they will offer seminar special pricing on the Enlightened Warrior camp. I have MMI scholarships available for you for free tuition (valued at $1,295)   Click this link to get your scholarship http://intothismoment.com/mmi

A-HO!*
Barbara

* A-HO is Lakota and means “as it should be.”

P.S. If you’d like to see my earned “badges of honor” they are on my facebook photos page. http://www.facebook.com/#!/album.php?aid=58913&id=1577721301